Lovesick? Drown It In Pills
by fayeswolf
Summary: If you had one choice, what would you chose? Love for a split second or an eternity without love? There's Yaoi, SasoDei,NaruSasu, gore and my first attempt at writing. (Some people are OOC at first but they change to their original personalities after some time. Please sit through my bad first two chapters, the rest is better, much better.) I DONT know how to rewrite this anymore..
1. Dearly Beloved

**kay, I have to exit this fic, cos when I read through it, it sucked… :(**

**Listen to what I listen to:**

**Linkin park : Not Alone**

**LMFAO : party rock anthem**

I walked slowly. Of course one would walk slowly when your ass is sore and you don't fucking have a home. I wished I had a family, a home, and… even though I really don't wanna admit it, love. You know, some people are born losers, while some are born winners. Guess what I'm born as. I rub ay muddy and sore arse, ever since I fell through the fence it's been hurting like fuck. I spread a piece of cardboard against the wall, trying to get some sleep. Although it isn't immediate, I fall asleep somewhere between agemendon and dawn.

When I wake up I have this strange craving for chocolate. It's still dark outside however. I know, I don't need half as much sleep as humans do. I will just have to settle for a Mars bar at seven-eleven. However, when I reach into my pocket, my wallet isn't in there. I feel a rush of anger course through my already bloodless veins. I'll find that bastard who took my wallet. But, first, I'll have to rob a candy store. At least it's a meal thrown in for free…

When I arrive at the nearest candy store, it's quite cramped, and I accidently end up knocking over a box of chocolates. Resisting the urge to just shove all the kit kats into my mouth and kill the cashier, I put all of the candies back into their box then put it back on the shelf. Just then, this golden haired girl with sea blue eyes brushes past me. She has a bang over her left eye and her hair touches her shoulders. I would have ignored her, if not for my WALLET sticking OUT of HER pocket. "Brat," I say, trying to be patient, which I already lack greatly, "That's my wallet you're carrying. In your pocket, so give it back to me little girl. Now." I say. The girl glares at me like I am crazy.

"EXCUSE ME UN! I AM A FUCKING GUY !" he yelled, obviously pissed at me. I'm shocked.

"H-How could someone as…as…feminine as you be a guy?' I blurt out. Actually, I almost said pretty. Yes, I admit it, I am a bisexual, and the guy in front of me looks like a goddess. Somehow, I couldn't make heads or tails of what to make of him. Was he a transvestite? Anyway, to cut a long story short, I managed to get both my wallet and his name, it was Deidara. However, the only thing I didn't like was that he insisted on following me home since I 'looked like crap'. At first, I declined, but when he threatened to stalk me 24/7 until he knew every single THING about me- INCLUDING how many times I masturbate; which I don't, I simply visit the hookers.

"Happy brat? This is my home." I said, pointing to the piece of cardboard I slept on. Deidara looks appalled.

"Just how CAN you sleep in a place like this un?" he exclaimed. "Never mind, you'll be able to find a nicer place at my home un." I try to protest, but it is in vain. The blonde is surprisingly strong for a human and I can't resist like how I usually do.

"And after you're done with your bath, there's a set of clothes that might fit you un," Deidara was acting almost like how a mother would to her only son. I wonder, if deidara would make a good mom… ARGH! WHAT AM I THINKING! MALES CANT GET PREGNANT! Unless, he's a werewolf, then there is a slight exception… Deidara is still rambling but when he notices I'm not listening, he snaps his fingers in front of my Face. "Hello, I'm talking to you un. Don't ignore me. I said that I don't care IF you are a vampire, you will stay here with me. And I don't care if you hate me as like the other vampires, you don't have to talk to me, you can make yourself scarce when my fellow werewolf friends are over but please; don't go back to that alley. It's dangerous un. You wouldn't believe how damn many demons lurk there. You're lucky you are still alive by now un!" Damn, I guess that I'm stuck with a werewolf for a housemate, and since I was only turned like, three weeks ago, it's not like I can actually run from someone who looks like he has been a werewolf for like, since he was a baby, (although he is rather hairless except for the hair on his head and his eyebrows) so I agree. But, the moment I grow stronger, I'm so escaping. I feel much more comfortable out in the streets than to be with a werewolf.

Surprisingly, Deidara's clothes fit me. When I finished changing, the blonde werewolf is sitting by the television watching Hunter X Hunter fishing for chips in a huge bag. His lithe frame is covered by a loose blue blanket. I slowly approach him before sitting down. He doesn't move, but hands me the bag of chips, I gingerly put my hand inside it and retrieve a rather broken potato crisp, shoving it into my mouth. After awhile, Deidara piped up, "Hey, I-I never got to know your name un… so"Sasori." The answer seems to be enough for Deidara who grabbed yet another handful of chips from the bag. Grinning, he stuffed all the chips into his mouth at one go. Deidara was so cute… and innocent, it seemed he had very little experience about the world despite being a werewolf. Must have come from a sheltered family…

"No un, you can't sleep on the floor, it's just not right to treat a guest that way un," Deidara wanted me to sleep in his double bed with him, but I'd probably get a boner just from touching his skin. "Please danna un? Just this once?" Oh god, Deidara is giving me those cute puppy dog eyes… I feel a sting in my groin, if I don't find a bathroom soon, things are definitely gonna get ugly; I'm probably gonna end up raping Deidara. And to top that off, the way Deidara moaned out the words danna… god I need a bathroom. I excused myself from Deidara and hurried to the bathroom to get the deed done.

I come silently moaning Deidara's name, inside my mind, it's not my hand, but Deidara's who is pleasuring me. Finally, after washing my hands, I go back to face Deidara.

"About your offer, I think I might want to sleep together tonight with you," I said, not completely sure of myself. "YAY UN! COME IN, but I'm playing nyan cat un ,don't disturb AH; damnit un, I just fucking lost," Deidara swore and put the phone by his bedside before snuggling up to me. "Hold me danna un," he said. Reluctantly, I complied. The blonde was too cute to resist.

**So I hope you like the rewritten story, and please accept my earnest apology *dodges tomatoes thrown at her* and please review! *gets hit in face with basket***


	2. Simple and Clean

** To heck with my mom! Was stuck with revising for exams the whole week so I didn't update at all and my fucking father was like watching me like a hawk so couldnt updae any BL!Its done anyway, my exams!**

**I listened to:payphone-maroon 5**

** She will be loved-maroon 5**

** I actually planned to make them do gangnam style but decided against it…**

I woke up somewhere between now and tomorrow, I forgot when, and where. But I could feel feathers on my cheek, so it couldn't have been too back in my past…around the 20th century I think… I was still human back then but I knew that I was going to be turned soon. I tried to sit up but it seemed that my hands were chained down. Ne,I remembered this moment. I would be turned soon. The pain; the hate; the sorrow, (no, Sasori was not raped XD) I hated this moment. And the fear, it bit at my insides, it tore at me, I couldn't close my eyes no matter how much I tried… And then woke up.

"Sasori un!" a familiar voice jolted me awake. Deidara was shaking me awake. "What Deidara?" asked.

"Un! There's a crisis here un! An epic crisis!" he yelled. WHAT! My head shot up. "WHAT DEIDARA WHAT!" I yelled.

"Nee…un…" Deidara murmured. He stared into my eyes. "Well?!" I asked.

"Un…"

"So…"

"Err..."

"What?"

"I'm… out of chips un…" Blondie deadpanned. I wanted to jump up, scream, cuss and shout "GODDAMMNIT DEIDARA, IF YOU GO THROUGH CHIPS AT 10 BAGS PER HOUR YOU'LL RUN OUT OF CHIPS EVEN IF WE GAVE YOU ALL THE FUCKING CHIPS IN THE DAMNED WORLD!" But somehow, call it being a pussy or a faggot, I abandoned all sense of manly pride and, raising my figure from the recliner, reached out to face the mochrome task of *dum dum dum!* BUYING CHIPS!(Author san loves chips, but barely eat more than five a day or I get a sore throat: OPP-OPP-OPP-OPP-OPPA CHIPS STYLE!)

The walk to the convenience store brought back familiar memories, such as the day I meet blondie; whose hair had grown out till it touched his waist now. I was interrupted from my thoughts by the sound of murmuring. Being a curious person, I traced the source of the murmurs.

"Sasori, what's wrong un?" Deidara asked. I ignored him. There was too much going on in my head now. I had managed to avoid my past, continuously running from it, but now, it too was beginning to catch up with me. "Sasori un, don't be like that, there's something wrong un!" Deidara continues, but I'm not listening. That face… those eyes… it was her. There was no doubt. The woman I hated the most and yet loved the most. My eyes brimmed with tears. The nerve of her to run from me when I needed her the most; then return to me when I didn't expect. What a needy bitch. The thought of her sickening face made me want to slap her up a bit, but yet… I had to admit that I truly did love her with all of my heart. "Sasori un?" Deidara keeps calling out my name. Suddenly, I feel hate, hate towards this stupid blonde bimbo who's annoying voice pesters me all day, like that fucking fairy from The Legend of Zelda. "SAS-" he begins. There's a sickening crack in the air. My eyes widen. HOLY SHIT… I just slapped him; I just slapped my crush… Fucking hell Sasori, you're goddamn retarded, slapping the person who just saved you, took you under his wing, made you feel happy for once, and you ruined it; like how you did the _last_ time. I breathed out in frustration. This was getting nowhere. I just stood there: staring at Deidara. I expected him to yell at me, slap me or even kick me out but then again, I learnt early on, that people are full of surprises.

Deidara's felt fell for a moment as he held his hands to his stinging cheek to his face. "Ow, un… you don't have to do that you know… if you don't want to buy chips for me then just say so!" Deidara said. I was stunned. People who I used to be close with would hit back or start yelling at me, but Deidara was a different person altogether. "Why, why, didn't you hit me back or yell at me?" I asked the wolf. "I've gotten hit quite a lot of times before un, so I don't mind much if someone hits me these days; it's really quite a normal thing actually un." He said, smiling like the Cheshire cat. "Who?" I asked. ARRRRH! WHO WOULD WANT TO IT SUCH A CUTE THING! "It's normal for people to hit strays un." Deidara responded. I opened my mouth to say something when Deidara interrupted me. "Come on un, I wanna watch TV!" he said as he flopped down on the couch and reached for the remote control.

"_Right and today is the 4__th__ anniversary of Ah Meng's death, and-oh, it seems we've gotten an emergency broadcast coming in. (A 36 year old man has collapsed suddenly in the busy streets of Tokoyo, itseems that by-standers reported to have witnessed strange flower-like appendages emerge from him(think chest bursters) .The flowers were reported to have a splitting appearance to the Ipomoea alba; or moonflower, has sparked wide public controversy; some people believe the flower –like appendages to be a strange currently unknown disorder, while some others believe it to be a curse from god for man's vices.)"_

Deidara sighed and switched channels. His nonchalant behaviour contradicted with my rigid posture and panicked state. Shaking severely, I got up from the couch. Walking back to the kitchen, I downed a glass of water to calm myself down as the non-existent blood raced through my veins. I remembered. There had been a pandemic in my village; it was a small village, so they were able to contain my village, and the plague was eradicated.

Altogether, only 10 people survived the plague. l Symptoms manifested themselves in two or three days, and were identified by a weak pain in the gut and flowers, yes I'm not shitting you, flowers appearing painlessly; firstly from the eyes, then on the arms and legs. On the eighth day, extreme numbness, fever and nausea appeared. Then, on the fourteenth day, the victim usually succumbed to death by falling into a deep sleep only to never wake up again. However, firstborns and identical twins; despite being able to contact the disease, would not die from it. But, then again, they were turned into living carriers of the virus itself.

You see, the virus spreads through pollen released from the antlers of the flower. Cutting of the antlers would just cause them to grow back again. In my village, they killed all children who had no siblings or were identical twins. In times of crisis, I learnt that people would do absolutely anything for self-preservation. The flower people, as my people had called it, were a bunch of jabbering maniacs, the chemicals released by the virus caused hallucinations and delirium. The virus was never given a name and the cases were probably filed away in a cold remote corner. But, the virus was making a comeback, or at least that was what I thought. I went back to the couch and sat down, next to Deidara. I took a deep breath, I had to tell him. "Deidara, I have to tell you something, I know what you hear might not be so satisfying but please bear with me,' I said. To my surprise Deidara said with much aloofness, "I understand. There's no need to tell me."

**Sigh, I sadly, ran out of ideas, so I had to leave this on a cliff-hanger. I'm sorry, but I'll reveal more to you as the story progresses. So, I beg you guys to stay tuned.**


	3. Sanctuary

**The more I watch/read mpreg, the less it makes sense to me. No more mpreg, especially in this story! BTW, my characters don't get Japanese names because this doesn't take place in Japan. Deidara and Sasori do coz, well, that's their names…Am I the only anime fan who hates pocky?**

**Beta'd by: XxDreaming of RealityxX**

_You need to show, not tell. Show. Show. Show._ With every breath I took, I forced myself to remember what my drama teacher told me. Tch, yeah, yeah, I know, all people who do drama are emo and gay. Well shut up. It doesn't apply all the time. I didn't dress emo, neither was I gay. Well, I was bi. Sasuke's the name, and back then, I was in my last unfortunate year of Secondary School. My family…don't even get me started on them. My dad wasn't home half the time, my mum was a drunk, and when dad came home, he would yell at my mum for being shit-faced. My older brother is studying in England. No, I'm sorry, I mean WAS. He died in a car accident last year. Not that I really care, good riddance. He would torment me whenever he could, quite often, so to say. I have to learn to show, not tell. But how do you show someone, to convince them; to release you from this hell?

That day, when I got back from school, of course not _today_, or the day before today, but some time ago; my mum was passed out on the couch again, like usual.

I took one look at her and snorted, before going to fetch her a blanket, some aspirin and a glass of water for when she woke up. I then tried to get out my books and study a little, but _that man…and that rose-like flower…_god, I just couldn't forget that man. Did it hurt when the rose blossomed from his body? Covered his face? BANG! I jolted upright.

My head had hit the table; probably when I was distracted with that man's face and that _rose_…ugh. I opened up my bag and took out the single object I managed to steal from the man. It was white, and soft. Like a scrap of my mum's kimono; back when she still bothered to do her hair and change into clean and ironed clothes instead of just walking around in some worn pants and shit. Back when she didn't just sleep with any man who would give her money. I'd seen her come back with more than one man at least 3 times, but I'd stopped caring really. I guess that's just the way my life is.

I opened my drawers and fished out a clean t-shirt and jeans. I changed into them then dumped the laundry into the worn and dirty basket. When I was younger, my mother would let me sit in it when it was empty and she'd whirl me around. Tears prick my eyes at the thought but I brush them away. I had to move on anyway. I could survive without them. My work shift at the music store lasted until 6:30 before I swapped places with a feisty blonde guy with long hair,(he owned the store) who worked until 11:00 before closing the store for the day. Then I could finally pick up some ingredients from the local supermarket before going home to take a warm shower and prepare dinner. I usually spent my time doing homework and maybe, just maybe, I would crawl onto facebook to check if any of my friends were still on at 1 in the morning. I had roughly 10 minutes to get to the music store. Well, no point in sitting around doing nothing. It was already time to go.

I pushed past the sacks of rubbish and planks with my feet**,** before opening the back door of the small yet popular store. I caught the new employee dozing off yet again, headphones on her head. Some strange dub step was rattling off again.

"Oi! Wake up kid." She jolted upright with a start.

"W-ha?" She was a red-head of medium stature, with a face like a doll but not much definition in her body. She reminded me of a dolls face attached to a bamboo stick. Shiny green eyes stared back at me. Stupid kid. She was also lazy as fuck. "Oh hi Sasuke," she exclaimed, trying to brush her mop of frizzy red hair back.

"Whatever. Do you have those Burns I requested?" I replied curtly. You see, the reason we were so popular was because we would burn pirated CDs and download pirated video games for our customers at only one-quarter of the products retail price. For the games, you'd pay 25 bucks for a memory card with 80 games of your choice. We also sold pirated computer games, complete with cheats for some. But it was quite a risky business. We couldn't advertise our games for fear of the police catching us; so it was a strictly an under-the-table business.

"Oh, right here," the girl, who was also known as Lana threw a few CDs onto the table.

"Don't throw them!" I exclaimed.

"Whatever." Lana said, making a face as she dashed out the door.

The whole of my shift passed by without much trouble, other than one random dude who kept badgering me to give him a discount of 100%. Yes there were such retarded people in this world. I was wondering when the blonde bimbo would arrive since it was about 7:00 PM and he was never late. Maybe a short nap would suffice…

When the door slammed.

My head jolted upright as I tried to register that sound. Then it hit me like a brick on the head. BLONDE BIMBO! He had this habit of slamming doors. We all called him blonde bimbo due to his lack of common sense.

"KLYE! How many times did I fucking tell you not to slam the door!" Kyle was about the same age as me, with long bright yellow hair that touched his hips and green eyes. His face was cute, in a boyish way but not handsome. He, however, was slow in areas like common sense and manners; which he unsuccessfully made up with a carefree and slightly cheeky nature which led people to believe he was an idiot.

"Hey Sasuke, I got you the DVDs you asked for," Kyle said as he tossed the DVDs onto the counter. Stupid brat. I told him so many times not to throw the DVDs onto the counter because they usually ended up under the weighty cash register. Kyle ignored me and sauntered to the coffee machine. He grabbed two clean blue mugs and placed them under the coffee machine's dispenser. In a flash, I had grabbed his hand in a vice-like grip.

"Kyle, No. No! Bad boy, no coffee!" I yelled. Well…maybe I was overreacting, but coffee makes Kyle throw up, but unlike others, Kyle did _not_ learn. If he got half of his face burnt off, he would go ahead and do EXACTLY the same things to get the other half of his face torched off; if it meant getting to a bunch of grapes or a cup of bubble tea. I guess some people are just simple minded like that.

"Anyway Kyle," I said, as I pick up the cup of coffee, "I'm going home now, don't drink any coffee and remember to lock the door." I started to head out of the door when I faintly heard Kyle's voice.

It turned out that I had a call. That was normal. The only thing that was not normal was that the caller's IP address was 1800-BLANK. At first**,** I suspected this to be some prank call; however being impatient, I tapped the answer button. "Who the hell are you?" I demanded into the phone. Right now, I think it was pretty stupid of me to answer the call. For there was nothing but static over the line. "Stupid Fuckers!" I yelled, tossing Kyle's phone aside. Kyle frowned.

"Don't just throw my phone aside like that you know! All my songs are in there!" He cried, squirming under a music rack, where it had slid under.

"Stupid fox! It was your fault for making me answer the damn phone!" I yelled back. Kyle had now gotten his phone back, which he tossed at my head, narrowly missing me.

"FUCK YOU! I AIN'T GOT TIME FOR THIS!" He said, storming out the door, slamming it behind him with real venom. At that time, I did not feel even the least bit sorry for what I had done. Now, I had. After all, Kyle wasn't the one tied up with ropes twenty stories underground with some stupid blonde prick bothering you.

I was held in a cavern known as Hell for sixteen days in a row, with nothing but a rusty tap and a bucket. A guard would come in once a day and pass me food. He would then inject me with a clear liquid; what was it? Well, I didn't know. I only knew that the vision in my left eye was becoming very fuzzy and my stomach hurt, but not a whole lot. The pain was more like a stitch in your side.

The guard's name was Naruto, and he was very friendly. He liked to sit between the bars that separated us and talk. He talked about life, his life out of this hellhole and his friends; his favorite food and many other things. But not once did he mention his family.

On the Eighth day**,** I noticed that Naruto did not come down to visit me. I paced about in my cell, _back and forth, back and forth. To and fro, to and fro. _I was also feeling dizzy and nauseated. My arms had lost almost all of their feeling. I was so tired too, just so tired. I walked over to a clean part of the floor and lay down .As I felt the hands of sleep carry me away, I recounted the events that lead me to such a pitiful demise.

I was pissed at Kyle. He was such a bimbo who liked to start fights for no apparent reason. 'Stupid fox, just fucking grow up already!' I thought angrily and kicked at an empty can, sending it rolling down the road. I continued to stomp and kick at the can, imagining it to be the blasted fox. Stupid fox stupid fox stupid fox! A shrill scream shook me out of my thoughts.

_I was stupid back then, and curious so I decided to investigate. I still had to admit, I was shocked at what I saw. A man was beating up a young lady, who was crying out for help. The lady had long blonde hair which was matted with blood. Anger welled up inside of me._

_He had no right to beat up a weak, defenseless woman like that. Mustering up my courage, I charged straight at him, flashing my pocket knife at him. The man dodged my attack and elbowed me in the stomach, fortunately missing. I laughed silently to myself. He had terrible aim. I punched him as hard as I could in the stomach, slamming him against the wall. I hit him once more, ensuring that he was out._

_Then I walked to the lady. "Miss, are you alright?" I inquired, checking her for any possible broken bones. The woman shook her head and gestured towards her ribs. I blushed, but felt around her chest anyways. The punch to my face was not expected. I had learnt two things from this brief experience._

_The first was that this person was NOT a woman. Secondly, the so called 'woman' clearly had some sort of malicious intent as I felt my wrists being tied to my back. The person sat on my torso as he knocked me out with a blow to the head_.

A man in a white lab coat stared at the motionless body lying on the floor. He checked off another box on the piece of paper.

In neat letters**,** he wrote 'Subject Delphinium**,** successful.'

**The maybe overuse of flowers in this story is actually because I believe flowers are special to everyone and flowers represent many different things. By the way, a delphinium is the official flower of July and in this story, experiments are named after their official flower mascot of the month, so if an experiment was started in January, it would be called experiment Carnation, carnation being the flower mascot of January and February the Violet and so and so… anyway, July 23 is Sasuke's birthdate, so his flower would be the delphinium, quite a coincidence don't you think? Anyway I will see you guys soon. I love mine craft.**


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